yesterdays..

wonder why, I non stop thinking back my old days. I feel to read back my primary n secondary school autograph album. those private published diaries n books, so eager wanted to read them. want to go back my banting'80 small room - my private paradise, recall my yesterdays memories.

now, I wish to read back my school time Chinese essay n Malay karangan - I want to read what was my opinion on 'pendatang asing' the advantage n disadvantage. feel to see photos that I wore my school uniform.

many many more... those letters from my best friends, from closed guy friends, from special friend, from oversea net friends.. I want to look back my 1st day cover collection - msia sepang f1 opening n UK 2000 millennium collection. my stamp albums, my bookmark collection, my school time annual book that edited by me n a group of ajk.

the feeling is so strong, till I can't fall asleep, till I want to get all these things stay in front of me now. till I.. feel to take a day off from working so I can walk along the journey.. memory lane.. this strong feeling, worried me. why? why all out of sudden.. why? I am feeling scared now.. hmm

the below post is 1 of the posts I post in chc co-blogs few years back (2006? 2007?) got this in my fb mailbox yesterday. chc asked 'can post this out?' thanks him for reminding me about this post, I love it much. I repost it in my fb. feel to keep a copy for all the posts that I blog in his blog. the posts in the blog, is more to my feeling deep in my heart, I love them - a place for me to voice out my inner me. maybe I can get chc to send me a copy :)

----
你我携手风雨路
爸：我的爸爸
公：我的外公
她：我的妈妈
场景：外婆的七十大寿庆祝会
~
爸：当时她妹的男朋友都买炒面炒米粉的给你们当夜宵；我只有能力买一块钱的麻花卷；也是很开心啊她的弟弟妹妹吃一大袋的麻花卷配咖啡喝。她当时不开心，但现在她都比她妹过得好啊！要怎样比，我没能力我要怎么充面子。。
~
公：(点头)
~
爸：我当初只说了‘我现在没钱，你是我老婆；他日我富有了，有能力了，你也是我老婆；我沦落了，你还是我的老婆。。你一旦跟了我，我就不会把你丢了。。你自己想清楚。。’
~
公：(微笑点头)
~
爸：你知道她的衣服鞋子有多少橱吗？我都让她去买，因为当初我没能力时，她和我一起挨苦，现在我可以负担时，我就应该让她享福。。虽然我还没资格让她当富太太，但你问她天天睡到几点醒来，日子过得比富太太还要写意。。。。哈哈哈。。酒啊，什么蓝带的。。。。都喝到怕。。好吃的，都吃了，什么皇帝餐啦，上等鲍鱼啦。。
~
公：哈哈哈哈哈哈。。来，干一杯！
~
爸：中国不知去了几次了，还不算香港，台湾，澳洲，泰国，本地。。每次问她要不要去还撒娇说要顾狗顾外孙不要去，到了要出发时，才一直问一直问，哎，就干脆多定张机票给她。。
~
妈：哈哈哈。。你很坏的罗。。。去中国一直走一直走很累的。。我心又没力。。但回到家看回照片，还会回味，还会想去。。哈哈。。。。
~
公：哈哈哈。。
~
爸：我的孩子们都大了，都嫁人了，都要结婚了，我当父亲的责任，该做的，都已做到最好了。。我现在要讨小老婆哪怕没有？十多二十个不是问题。。但我没有，就因为当初我说过我不会不要她。。大家是一起走过来的。。
~
公：对！对！来，喝一杯！
~
爸：她最聪明的是，选到了我！哈哈哈。。。。 来，喝了它。。
~
妈：每次都爱讲我‘good for nothing...’ 如果酱子的话，我哪会投资他这粒烂苹果啊。。。。
~
爸：哈哈哈。。
~
公：哈哈哈。。。。是你眼睛精噢。。。。哈哈。。。。这苹果不错噢。。。。哈哈。。