last nite laogong went for business cny dinner. i was waiting in the office till nearly 10pm. felt so guilty. coz these 2 days i went back late n left house early in the morning, bbb were sleeping. then i felt so frustrated, coz i didnt had not packed my bag for today outing. hmm. we took 10:03pm train back to putrajaya, then reached home 11pm+ 11:40pm then only started to look for baju for the outing.
i couldnt get anything from my wardrobe, my cloths more are for office wear, or, home wear @_@ then i went to my mum's wardrobe. wow!!! so many choices for me :p obviously, mum's cloths are more colorful n happy looking than my own baju. hubby said, michelle, next time u dont need to buy cloths, u wear your mum's one, more nice looking @_@
packed my bag till 1:30am. prepared to sleep. then dad was boiling water. then i talked to dad since long time i didnt sit down with him. then talked n talked, i didnt feel sleepy anymore. we talked about money. dad said, now he got less income due to economy crisis :( less demand for bird nest too - we have more free bird nest to eat :p he told me he needed to keep money for ah gong's 3 year prayer, which is in this mth, it definetly would be > rm10k then he wanted to save money for sis's wedding, 'at least i need to support her since both of them are just normal working' then dad wanted to reserve money for digo, 'who knows one day he wants to invest or doing business, right?' then he said 'i also need to reserve money for u all, what if u all need it one day'
love n touch. i can feel how much he loves us. not only helping us in buying house la, prepare us for our own family, but he also thinking on maintaining our current life, n prepare for those unexpected happen in the future. dad must be very tired. i think, for those parents who really care n love their children, all all like my papa, working hard, even now dad's knee n ankle are start feeling weak n pain, he still non stop thinking for children.. can really see papa is old already, his eye bags, wrinkle, dull skin tone :~ it made me recall 1 of the tv program i watched that day, when the giant of the family fall down, all collapsed. for me, i would definetly collapse, my dad is the best man to me, he is my lifelong supporter, if he cries, i would be helpless.. if he gone, i would be very really sad n empty...
after chatting about dad's money plan, i shared with dad about my office division transformation. dad's words comfort me. n he told me this, 'no matter what, it's ok, change doesnt mean the situation gonna be bad, it can be better too. so take it easy, if u have no job, never mind, look for job slowly' hmmm i know why dad wants to reserve money for us, coz if anything bad happen, he would take up our responsibilities n commitment, at least, my bbb for sure have milk to drink, n tuition fee to go to the school :( till when har? i can let my parents to feel easy to let us go n they dont need to worry about us, n enjoy their lives there?
hmmm.. nowadays, almost every night mum helps me to apply heat balm or massage my back or foot before i go to sleep. obviously, my body condition is weaker than mama. feel so embarrassed to tell this, mum needs to take care my bbb at day time, night time pula needs to massage me. how har, if one day papa n mama leave me.. :~~~
hmm chat with papa till 3:30am. then i went to sleep. all papa's words n facial expression was non stop floating on my mind. so tired.. so sleepy.. but my brain didnt rest.. when i almost felt asleep, both angel n eva crying. hmmm made them sleep, then only i sleep.
this morning, 6:30am, my eyes quarter-opened. n i really hope tonight, my gal friends can sleep well with my snoring :p cant wait to meet them there, been working with these 3 gals for years, >5 years, n now 1st time we go outing together. from penang, johor, pahang they will meet me at genting highlands ^_^ my collegue said, u really have the guts to do this.. ya, 3 days 2 nights outing. i must miss bbb like crazy! this morning i hug n kiss royee, 'mama gonna come back only in this sunday afternoon, be a good boy ok? listen to papa n wai po. come give mama a hug..' royee hugged n kissed me 'bye bye mummy' before i closed the door, he came out n waved bye bye to me again..
1 day, i want my bbb to be proud of me to be their parent, like how much i respect n love my parents. will do my level best, even, i have 50+ years old body age at this nearly age 30 :p
